Typing between sleeping...

I am typing this while under the influence of Phenergan cough syrup so forgive me if I space out or go into a turrets spasm.

I am sitting here watching the food network and wondering why are so many of these chef ho's are so dang skinny??? You know they either don't eat that crap or they are shoving their finger down their throat. I mean if I ate EVERYTHING that the cooking bimbo Sandra Lee cooked I would be 500 pounds!! She totally grates my nerves with that "Semi Homemade" crap. My idea of semi-homeade is Hamburger Helper!

On another note I have a funny from my kid world. Earlier this week the Pope came to the US and we watched it at work (one more thing to add to the list!). When I picked Matthew up from school (catholic school at that). I asked him if they got to watch the Pope come in on the plane on TV. His response... "Who's the Pope?" I asked him if he was joking he said no. So then the COC mom told him that the Pope was the head of the Catholic Church and lived in Vatican City in Italy. His response... "I thought Father Martell was the head of the Catholic Church." too funny!

More things to do when you are bored during a merger

Here is what you have been waiting for. Part 2 of things to do when you are bored during a merger.

1. Bring a medicine ball from home and toss it to an unsuspecting "friend".
2. See how long each employee can balance a 10 pound medicine ball on their head. Winner gets to leave early!
3. Use paper towels as bowling pins and use medicine ball as the bowling ball. Use packing tape to set up the lane. don't forget this step. Very important!
4. Leave crumbs in various places on the carpet just to make sure the cleaning people are doing their jobs. Since you sure aren't!
5. Look at different FREE Coupon sites. might need to start clipping those.
6. For those fashionistas out there. Bluefly.com has discounted designer names.
7. Decided which co-workers will fill the roles of the cast of Grease.

40 Things to Do While You Are Bored During a Merger.

1. Copy a jellybean on the copy machine and tell everyone it is your ultrasound at 18 weeks.
2. Go to the webside www.engrish.com and laugh histerically till you snort and poot.
3. Play various FREE on line games.
4. Jingle all the change in your pockets till your co-workers want to jump out the window.
5. Put empty whiskey bottles around the office for sh*ts and giggles.
6. Turn your companies logo teddy bear into a voodoo doll.
7. Talk about your net-worth.
8. Count trips to the olive tree.
9. Place bets on how many people will still be here at noon.
10. Place pictures of co-workers "heads" on celebrities bodies.
11. Read the Breaking News on www. tmz.com. What has Britney done now??
12. Play hand tennis with packing tape.
13. Play "kick my shoe off".
14. See who can squeeze themselves into a box. the smaller the box the better.
15. Office pilates
16. Eat lots of gum and gummy things.
17. Draw faces on fruit of co -workers.
18. To Resume or not to Resume.
19. Be excited for any thing to do even if it is not work related.
20. Play name that tune for all the OLD classic TV shows
21. Have a Bejeweled competition.
22. Paint your fingernails. tomorrow will be toenails.
23. Draw doobies coming out of the mouth of your former CEO.
24. Put various "crap" in the purse of former co-workers.
25. Put dirty captions on the pictures of the UPS calendar.
26. Drink on the job.
27. Drink on the john.
28. Drink in your chair.
29. Drink in the copy room
30. Snort hand sanitizer to get high. You should try it if you haven't already!
31. Make up your own dialog to Maria Bartilomo's "After the Call".
32. Stare at co-workers to make them uncomfortable.
33. Nose around and look at other peoples computers to see what they are doing.
34. Tattle on your co-workers if a coke explodes in the freezer.
35. Instead of cleaning up the coke yourself, tell the boss and let a female clean it.
36. Learn the Obama Yomama dance.
37. Watch co-workers do "Hip Hop Abs".
38. Run up and down the stairs in 4 inch heels
39. Do cart-wheels along the trading floor
40. Imitate your co-workers while they are in the bathroom.

I'm baaaccckk!!

I am back!! Finally passed all the tests and have time now. I have lots of time now that Bear Stearns has been "bought". We have all become expert solitaire players. I, personally, prefer Majhong solitaire. If you don't know what that is I highly recommend it. Good for your mind.

Still nothing here on the dating end. Of course, Mr. Wonderful has not rang my doorbell yet. That is the only way I would meet him since I really don't go out. I just find going out to a bar to "find" someone extremely desperate and I am just not that! I think it is really gross to watch 40 something women,, wearing stuff a teenager would wear, trying to pick up a guy. YUK!!! Anyway, don't want to do the internet thing either. It gives me the creeps!

Actually, I am really enjoying single life. I don't have to answer to anyone but me and it feels great!